My Family reunion
by Aaronisme19
Summary: Someone at Sacred Heart is reunited with there family. But will it end up being deadly for the doctors of Sacred Heart. Sorry really bad at summerys I promise its better then it sounds. please check it out "
1. My Bad Day

Disclaimer: I do not own Scrubs but I do own this story so yay!

P.S Thoughts in Italics, this is set sometime during season 4

Another day in paradise I thought as I stalked through the doors of Sacred Heart. Now if I can just make it to the nurses station, grab my charts and get some coffee without running into newbie. I might be happy. I looked to his left and then his right and finally gave a small shrug and started towards the elevator. "Peek-a-boo" said a voice from behind causing me to close his eyes and sigh.

"Aah dammit newbie ya just ruined my day" I said as I entered the elevator. My protege frowned but followed me in "But you just got here" he pointed out as he stood next to me. I glanced towards him, "Yes but I was hoping to NOT see your girly self until I've had some coffee but of course since this is such a wonderful day and I'm in such a good mood, ya just had to ruin my plans"

Before J.D could say anything back to his mentor, the elevator stopped and they both got off, as they did, J.D stepped in front of trying to hold him off while thinking of something witty to say.

Hehe the kid looks hurt, serves him right he messed up my good day I thought as I looked at the young doctor before me. Without another word I give him one of my special shoulder rams which caused him to fall on the floor in pain, after giving him a smirk I went over to the coffee machine.

After sucking down a giant cup of coffee, I walked over to the nurses station to get my charts."Hey there Carla, wanna hand me my charts?" I asked sending her a small smile, she was my favorite nurse and a close friend. "Sure" she said giving me a smile of her own and handing me the charts. "Thanks"

After saying goodbye to Carla, I head over to my first patient, on my way there I see newbie standing against a wall clearly in some other world.I whistle to snap him out of it, he looks at me with a scared look on his face."Hey there Samantha how about we do some work instead of thinking about unicorns and candy bracelets all day"" How did you know?" he asked a bewildered look on his face. He walked off and I continued on my way to my next patient.

The day went as I knew it would, Horrible. Okay well not horrible but it was pretty boring and I thought I was going to have to punch newbie in the face if he was going to keep showing up everywhere.

"Dr. Cox" "Ooh right on cue" "What?" I shrugged and replied"I was just thinking about how you always ruin my mood and how your up my ass everyday and here you are" "Dr. Cox um there's a patient asking for you" "Huh?" "There's a patient, he said he wanted to see you and he wants you as his doctor"What in the hell? "Who is he?""I don't know I didn't ask him his name, but here's his chart" I took the chart from newbie and begin to read out loud.

"Mr. Jerry Santos, I don't know a Jerry Santos, newbie what are you trying to pull?"

"Nothing all I know is he asked if someone named Perry Cox worked here and I said yes then he asked if he could have you as a doctor and if you could come see him"

"Okay let's go see what this nutjob wants" I said squearing my shoulders and heading down the hall towards the room.

Who's Jerry Santos, I don't know one, maybe one of Jordan's friends?

Newbie and I walk in comfortable silence, as I walk into the room I open up the chart and read the name again just to let the guy know that I don't know him.

"Okay Mr. San-

As I looked up I saw the devil himself sitting in the hospital bed, with a big smile on his face.

"Hello Perry"

Hope you liked it kind of short, it will get better I promise. Message me if you think you know who the "devil" is :)


	2. My Destruction

**Disclaimer: I do not own Scrubs.**

**P.S Thoughts in Italics, this is set sometime during season 4**

**P.S.S hope you guys liked the first chapter, sorry for the grammatical errors, I wrote**

**it at like 5 in the morning, anyway read, rate. Enjoy**

**Ooh and thank you KT for your review :)**

I stood there frozen; every fiber in my body telling me I need to bash this guys head in with a pole or something, or maybe my own hands. "Are you going to say something Perry?"

He had that look of anger in his eyes that I'm sure no one else could recognize, at that something in me just snapped and I growled and walked out of the room in a maddening rage.

As soon as I was out of the room I punched the walls a few times making sure to leave some sort of mark in it. As I walked over to the nurse's station everyone just looked at me like I was crazy.

As I neared the station I saw Carla giving me a worried look before asking:"Perry you okay?"

Is she stupid of course I'm not okay. Her remark just fuelled to my anger and I snapped my arm out to collide with the desk tearing off all the papers stacked neatly in piles. I continued walking down the hall looking for something to break.

**Jordan's POV:**

This is so boring, I hate board meetings.

Some guy on the board was talking but I wasn't listening it was just too boring for me, he was probably talking about the same thing we talked about two weeks ago.

I was just about to stab myself in the head with a pencil when someone came running into the meeting."A doctor went crazy, he's…he's destroying everything"Ooh this sound like fun

"Meeting's over" I announced and walked out to see what was going on.

**Dr. Cox POV:**

I walked around the desk in search of a place to destroy. Whoever got in my way either ended up falling on the floor or had to pick up their charts from the floor. I saw a female intern rounding the corner - even in my anger I would never hit a women because unlike my father, I am some sort of human being- I merely smacked my hand out and all her papers flew to the ground.

As I walked I saw newbie;Don't come near me kid, I just might kill you I thought and like the idiot he is he tried to say something to me but he doesn't have a chance to finish his sentence, I threw him to the floor. Startled, he looked back at me like a lost puppy but I don't care, I continue walking. Then, I finally find it, the room I've been looking for. I go over to the room which is empty since nothing works in here and I destroy it.

**Jordan's POV:**

I walked over to the nurses station and took a look around me, there's holes in the walls from someone punching them, people are crying on the floor, and papers are everywhere.

"What the hell?"A nurse whose name I think is Carla or Carlota walks over to me "It's Perry"

"Yeah I figured as much, what happened?" I asked "I don't know he was in a room with a patient and then he just got angry and started breaking things""Who was the patient?" I asked really curious, Perry wouldn't just blow up on a random patient. "I don't know he's in that room over there" she replied, pointing to a room near my left. I walked over to room 312 and look inside, what I see sends a shiver down my back and I cry out in surprise.

"Ooh hello Jordan, I see you're still with Perry"

What the hell?

**Dr. Cox POV:**

I'm really trashing this room I mean REALLY trashing it. I flip over the hospital bed which should be very hard to do but with my anger/adrenalin rush I guess anything is possible.

I can't believe he's here, that mother fucker what the fuck is he doing here? He should be dead why isn't he dead? Well maybe I should kill him. Yeah maybe I should make sure he's dead.

I try tearing off the heart monitor from the metal pole its on but its not working, so I pick it up and start slamming in on the floor. It finally comes off and I break the pole in half, taking the part that doesn't have the wheels attached to it. And I go back to room 312 pole in hand.

**Jordan's POV :**

"Wha.. What are you doing here?""My chest has been hurting a lot lately so I decided to go and get check out" he replied. "I mean what are you doing in this room?"

"Ooh I blacked out in the office downstairs, so then I got shipped up here I guess""Oh okay" I replied, not sure what to say. He was the last person I expected to see, I thought he died a long time ago.

Just then a scream sounded off from down the hallway; I walked out towards the scream and saw Perry clutching a metal pole in his hands.

Ooh shit


	3. My Kill

**Disclaimer: I do not own Scrubs**

**P.S Thoughts in Italics, this is set sometime during season 4**

I walked down the halls with my pole in hand, some people were screaming but I couldn't hear any of it; all I heard was his voice inside my head."Are you going to say something Perry?"Who does he think he is talking to me like that? well he won't be able to talk anymore when I bash his head in with this pole. I smiled at the thought and continued walking towards his room.

**JD POV:**

Today started off as any normal day, Dr. Cox insulted me, Carla gave me advice on some problems and Turk and I messed around. It was suppose to be a good day but now all of a sudden it became like one of those horror movies Turk and I used to watch. The worst part was that, Dr. Cox was the bad guy.

**Daydream:**

Dr. Cox with a butcher knife

"I will kill all of you!"

He grabs JD and stabs him in the back

**Daydream ends**

Anyway, it all started when a patient named Jerry Santos decided he wanted Dr. Cox as his doctor, I told Dr. Cox the news and he went over to the guy. Then he came out of the room looking really angry and started breaking everything. When I tried to settle him down but he just threw me to the floor. Stunned I just laid there. Why does he hate me, why won't he let me help him?

I sat on the floor thinking for a few minutes, but then I saw Jordan, she was talking to Carla. I was going to go up to her and explain what happened but she just went over to Jerry's room. I heard Dr. Cox breaking stuff in the room down the hall and I figured he'd probably just trash the place and then go treat the guy or something.

I got up and walked over to Carla to ask her what Jordan said."Hey do you have any idea of what's going on?""Sorry Bambi but no, I talked to Jordan and she's over by that patient" "Maybe they know him?" "Maybe- Oh My God Bambi Look" I turned around to see Dr. Cox holding a metal pole and he was walking to Jerry's room.

**Jordan's POV:**

Oh my God he's going to kill him, I wouldn't hold it against Perry though that dick deserves it. I can't let Perry get in trouble though so I better go stop 's walking straight towards me, I look at his eyes and all I see is pure hatred.I hope he listens to me, well here goes nothing.

**Dr. Cox POV:**

I continue walking towards the room when I see is she doing here? I wonder as I continue walking. I decided to push past her since she's blocking my way to the door.

"Perry"She wraps her arms around my neck forcing me towards her, but I'm still looking at him, he has a huge grin on his face obviously enjoying the show."Perry listen to me its okay do you hear me its okay calm down" Jordan says, her fingers start to massage the knots in my neck.

I feel the anger leaving me but I don't want it to, I want to kill him, I raise the metal pole and continue walking towards him forcing Jordan to move with me as well. "Perry listen to me I love you, don't throw away your career for his sake, look at all you've done to get here, don't ruin it." Suddenly I don't hear or see anything except Jordan, Jerry is forgotten for the moment and all I want to do is hold on to her and forget about everything."Let's go outside" I nod; suddenly feeling too tired for words and drop my pole to the floor. Jordan takes my hand in hers and we walk outside.

After Jordan and I sat outside for what seemed like forever Bob came out to talk to us. "Perry what you did in there was very unprofessional, I would press charges but I'm pretty sure I won't hear the end of it from your wife here""Ex-wife' Jordan cut in."I don't care, you're suspended for two days Perry, I suggest you go and collect your things" "Sure thing bob-o" I replied,he gave me a worried look but I think he was scared I'd get angry again if he mentioned anything. With a nod he walked away.

We entered the building again and I walked over to my locker and grabbed my jacket, before going out I decided to look up on the damage I caused. We walked hand in hand to the nurse's station; Carla gave me a worried look before returning to work. I looked over at Jerry sitting on his bed, he was asleep and I was glad because if he would have made a remark I would have killed him.

I really wish I could be alone for a if Jordan could read my mind she turned to leave "I'll be outside" then she kissed me and walked off.I let out a giant sigh and put my hands on my head while staring at Jerry. I was so far lost in my thoughts about my past that I didn't see newbie standing next to me, I could tell he wanted to ask me something but I guess he was scared. Honestly I couldn't blame him.

"Dr.. Dr. Cox"I let out another sigh, suddenly wanting to share with my protégé the identity of this man."He's my father newbie"I heard him gasp in shock then I turned and walked out of Sacred Heart

**Well how'd you guys like it? Please review**


	4. Some scotch and some memories

_Oh my God Jerry is Dr. Cox's father? _

I stand there frozen, I really have no clue what to say to tell Perry.

_Hey sorry that's your Alcoholic father sitting in that hospital bed, do you need a hug?_

I sense that he left but I can't stop looking at Jerry, he's sleeping so he doesn't realize my staring but I just couldn't stop looking at him. He looked just like Perry I'm surprised I didn't catch it before.

_So this is the man that made Perry the man he is today, that basterd. Wait... Wait maybe Dr. Cox was just messing with me; I'll ask Jerry when he wakes up. That can't be his father, he always said he was dead and Jerry acted way to nice to be Perry's father. It has to be a mistake._

"Hey Bambi everything okay?"

"I'm not sure Carla"

I walk away from her worried stare and go check on some other patients.

**Dr. Cox POV:**

When we got in the car neither of us said a word, I would have said something but I honestly for the life of me could not talk. It was like something got caught in my throat forcing me to shut up for once; I really didn't mind I didn't feel like talking much anyway. I kept thinking about him, how he smiled and how he was so relaxed with my outburst, it was all just too crazy.

_I need some scotch and I need it now! God what the fuck was he doing there, I never thought I'd see him again, I thought he was dead. Whose fucking grave have I been dancing on for the last couple of years? Ugh I should have just killed him, and what's up with his name, Santos, what the fuck is that bull shit. Don't you mean Cox there dad or after you killed my mother did you have a change of heart and turn your whole life around?_

As much as I tried to fight back the memories of my childhood they were starting to pour out. I was glad we finally got home to my apartment, when we got there I practically ran to the bottle of scotch and chugged it down. As soon as the drink touched my lips the memories that were starting to play in my head soon became foggy and disappeared.

"Babe are you okay?"

"Well I don't know Jordan but seeing how my long lost dad who I thought was dead by now, suddenly showed up at my hospital requesting me to be his doctor for god knows what. I'm not to sure if I'm okay at the moment."

" Look I know your in a bad place right now but just know that I'm here for you, I'm going to check on jack and tell the nana she can leave now and then I'll be back, okay?

"Sure, jordaroo"

I sat down on the couch with my bottle of scotch and my favorite glass, Just then I got a phone call from someone.

"Hello"

"Perry what the hell is wrong with you? What's going on?"

"Carla I don't have time right now, ask newbie I'm sure he'd just love to tell ya"

No longer wanting to talk I closed the phone shut and threw it across the room.

"Please don't break the house because then instead of your money going on my botox it will have to go in repairs"

"Of course, wouldn't want the devil to show her true face"

She ignored me and came to sit down next to me taking my hand in hers.

"Do you want to talk?"

"Jordan I don't know what I want right now"

"D'you know he talked to me"

"What, what did he say?"

"Nothing really he was surprised to see I was still in your life"

I ran a hand through my curly hair and pulled her close to me.

"So you admitted your feelings for me in front of the whole hospital, how does that make you feel?"

"Oh please don't remind me"

"Haha, did you mean it"

"Look you know how we hate telling each other how we feel about each other?"

"Yeah?"

"We'll I think it's time we let each other know, I mean defiantly not in public but when were hear at home, maybe we can say the L-word"

"Has the she-devil gone soft" I made a face that was a mix of mocking and shock, she punched me in the rib which hurt like hell but like the man I am did what any man would do. I grinned and bared it.

"Shut up, it was just a thought. It's just seeing your dad again, it just reminded of me of when we were first dating and how I would always cry every night because I knew he was hurting you. I was so scared that one day you would get killed and I wouldn't be able to tell you that I lov…. "

"What was that Jordan?"

"That I loved you okay, happy?"

"Now I am" I grabbed her and posited her on me more so that I could hold her more comfortably.

"You don't need to worry about that anymore, he can't hut me anymore"

"I know"

"Jordan"

"Yeah?"

"I Love You"

She smiled and kissed me, then after kissing until our lips hurt we headed over to the bedroom.

**Jd POV:**

"Bambi if you don't tell me what Dr. Cox told you I WILL KILL YOU"

"Okay Carla jheezsh"

"Okay then spill"

"No, before I tell you anything I need to make sure it's true"

"Wait bambi"

Before she could even finish her sentence I ran into Jerry's room, good thing he was awake because I was just about to shake him.

"Oh hello, you were the one who was with Perry, right?"

"Yes"

"Does he have any relation to you; I always thought he was a bit on the gay side myself"

"Huh what, no he's more like a mentor to me. Look can I ask you something?"

"Sure"

"Are you his father?"

"Yes, did he tell you?"

"Yeah he did, but why is your last name Santos?"

"I've recently remarried; I decided to take her last name instead of mine"

"Oh okay well I have to go, bye"

"Hey wait"

"What?"

"Where's Perry?"

"He got suspended for two days"

"So he'll be back Wednesday?"

"Yeah"

I walked out of his room and over to Carla.

"Now can I know?"

"I guess, Dr. Cox said you could right?"

"Yeah"

"Okay so I guess Jerry's his father"

"What, oh my God really?"

"Yeah I guess, hey were's Elliott?

"Oh she had a day off, I should call her"

She walked off towards her Locker and I went to go check on my patients.

**Dr. Cox:**

_Wow sex was good, (not that it's never good) but this was something on a whole other multitude_.

I looked over at Jordan and watched her sleep, she looks just as beautiful as the day I saw her. Again I feel the memories of the childhood I try so hard to suppress seeping through the cracks of the wall I've built in my head. I practically jump out of the bed and go to put on my clothes, Jordan stirs awake and looks at me confused.

"Where are you going?"

"I just need to go outside, get some fresh air"

"Oh okay hurry back"

I go over to her and kiss her on the head, "I Love you"

"Love you back" she smiles, clearly glad that we are now saying the L-word and goes back to sleep

When I'm sure she's sleeping I go into my drawer and search through my jerseys, taking out my Jericho 941 F 9mm handgun. Then I go over to my Scotch cabinet and grab a bottle, I go outside to the roof and start drinking away the memories of my childhood, gun in hand.

**Jd POV:**

Aah shifts finally over, I was just about to go home when I had a strange feeling to go and check up on Perry. I was just going to ignore it and go home, it was a long day at work and I could have used a nice bubble bath but the feeling was way to strong.

_I guess I better go and see if he's okay or I probably won't be able to sleep tonight_

After about 20 minuets of walking I found myself staring at Dr. Cox's door. After finaly getting the courage to knock I had another weird feeling to go to the roof.

_Okay I have to be crazy I swear if he's not there I'm going to kill myself._

After finnaly reaching the top of the stairs and over to the door I opend it and looked around.

_Looks like no ones here.. Oh wait there he is_

I found Dr. Cox, he was standing on the edge of the roof with a bottle of scotch in his hand.

"Dr. Cox"

"Newbie?"

He turned around, he was waring a Detroit Red Wings jersey, his eyes were red and he had a gun to his face, it was under his chin by his neck.

"DR. COX!"

"Yeah Sabrina?"

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING, PUT THE GUN DOWN"

He must of forgotten about the gun because he looked at me with a weird expression then he finally brought the gun down and took another sip of his scotch.

"I'd like to be alone right now"

"Why so you can kill your self?"

"No. no newbie, I'm trying to think"

"Then why do you have a gun?"

"Why not?"

"Dr. Cox you're making no since"

"Not trying to"

"Look how bout we go inside, if you want we can talk or I can just leave but please give me the gun"

"No way newbie, I'll come inside but the guns staying with me"

I was going to argue with him more but he seemed to sense my hesitation and added.

" Look im not going to do anything, I've had this gun for a really long time. I just like to take it out when, well something pretaning to my family happens. I'll put it back as soon as we walk in the house"

"Okay"

"Oh and newbie, don't tell Jordan"

"Sure"

We walked down the stairs to his apartment together, I was still incredubley worried about him so I desided to stay with him for a little.

"Can I get you anything?"

"No I'm fine"

"Suite yourself"

He went into the kitchen and came back with some coffee

"Are you okay?"

"Listen here newbie, if you want to continue to sit here then I suggest you shut up about feelings, ya got it?"

"Okay"

We sat there on his couch watching some sport on the tv, after the game ended I decided to leave.

"So I'll see you Wednesday"

He gave a small grunt then nodded. I gave him a smile and walked out of his apartment, called a cab and went home.


	5. The days as we know them

**Disclaimer: I do not own Scrubs but I do own this story so yay! ****P.S Thoughts in Italics, this is set sometime during season 4 **

**P.S.S to anyone who actually reads this. I hope that you enjoy this chapter and I promise more to come. I will be updating on weekends preferably on Saturday. I start school Monday but I promise I will not abandon this story or any other ones I am doing. Please rate and review it would be much appreciated to know what people think of the story. thanks**

**Eliiott's POV :**

It had been two days since Dr. Cox suspension, the board wanted to give him more time off but Jordan threatened them so they backed down. I wasn't really excited for his return since he was probably just going to try to kill Jerry again and then go back home.

I couldn't really blame him, from what I've heard of Perry's father his dad liked to beat him and his sister senseless while his mother just looked on like nothing was wrong.

Although while Dr. Cox was gone his father Jerry soon became a favorite of the staff, he was nice and thanked people for taking care of him.

Being a doctor you don't get much appreciation so sometimes it feels good to get a simple thank you.

Carla was the first to ask Jerry about his past, he said that the whole reason he wanted Perry as a doctor was because he was a changed man and he wanted to reunite with his son.

_I think Perry should reunite with him, I think he really did change._

_(Flashback)_

I wasn't there when Dr. Cox went berserk , I was at home enjoying a long needed bubble bath when my phone rang. It was Carla, she sounded worried on the phone so I immediately asked what was wrong. She then told me what I missed while I was relaxing and I was shocked to my core.

"I can't believe Dr. Cox would do something like that"

"Well…."

"What else Carla?"

"The patient was his father"

"Ooh.."

(Flashback ends)

When I came back the next day it was a little weird without Dr. Cox. I guess I never realized it but he sort of keeps this place together, in a weird dysfunctional way.

I meet Jerry a few hours into my shift; he needed his IV bag replaced. I took a deep breath before walking in, forced a smile on my face and went in.

"Hello Mr. Cox"

"Names Santos, not Cox"

"Ooh I'm sorry do I have the wrong room" I let out a nervous laugh that sounded like I had a dead frog in my mouth.

"Umm.. No I'm Jerry It's just... I took my wife's last name"

"Ooh coolieo, I had a friend who did that once, his partner died in a skiing accident, poor Rico"

"Okay?"

"Ooh sorry"

It only took a few minuets to change the bag and before I left I gave a small smile.

"Thank you Dr. Reid"

" uum your welcome?"

_Wow it's been so long since anyone's ever thanked me for doing my job.. It feels nice._

I walked over to Carla who was sitting by the computer.

"Man he is so nice, are you sure he's Dr. Cox's dad?"

"That's what JD said"

"But JD could be wrong"

"Dr. Cox told him, Jd even asked Jerry and he said yeah"

"Wow, so Dr. Cox will be here tomorrow?"

"Day after"

"Okay well I got a lot of patients so I better get going"

"See you later"

( 2nd day)

Yesterday was pretty boring, all the patients really ever needed was a new Iv bag, I was so bored I barley called a nurse to do it and just did It myself.

_Today's a new day, maybe something exciting will happen?_

My shift started at 7am and ended at 12 at night so I wasn't to excited to start the day. I got out of bed, got dressed, did my makeup and went over to Sacred Heart.

(12:01)

_Oh my God I'm finally out of here, I'm so tired I could just fall asleep on the floor right now, no Elliott no you can make it to your house, you can make it."_

I'm not to sure how I got home. My thoughts were covered in a sleepy daze; all I could think about was sleep and my nice warm bed. Nothing really happened today I mainly worked on paperwork which is probably why I was so sleepy. Everyone wanted to go the bar and relax but I couldn't make it, I told Carla I would go another day and went home.

**Dr. Cox POV:**

These past two days have been good. Extremely good, me and Jordan seem to have grown close and as much as I hate to admit it. I'm happy. So happy in fact that I re-hee-aly do not want to go to work tomorrow. I can't believe I'm saying this but all I want to do is spend my time with the she-devil.

As if on cue she stirs awake in my arms, _dear God she looks so beautiful._

I plant my lips on hers and feel as if all my problems have left me, its like she became the perfect brand of scotch for me and all I want to do is get drunk off those precious lips of hers.

"What was that for?"

"You're beautiful"

"Are you okay per-per?"

"Ha-ha yeah, what I can't tell you your beautiful?"

" uum no because then that would mean you actually gave me a compliment, and we both know you don't do well with those"

"So what I cant compliment my wife anymore, or do you just like it when I really say how you look. For example I don't know if you can handle anymore work on your face because you will then in fact be made from china, and yeah I know you're really the spawn from Satan himself but china is cutting it pretty close seeing as how they are both pretty much down there, if you know what I mean"

"There we go, I thought you went soft for a moment, and I think you mean ex-wife not wife"

I pull her close to me and bring her lips to mine, we stay like that for what seems like forever then her hand some how finds its way to my boxers and we all know how that works out.

When were finished I pull my boxers back on and get up.

"I'm going to get some scotch, want anything?"

"Martini"

"Sure"

Before I go and make the drinks I go and check on Jack, he is sleeping away the word right now and I can't help but stare at this beautiful boy of mine.

_I'm a dad._

I don't care if Jack is already pretty big but I still can't believe I'm a father. Me Percival Ulysses Cox is a dad. What a crazy world we live in. I walk over to him and plant a kiss on his forehead, and then I dash out as quietly as possible so I don't wake the boy.

After making our drinks I walk back to the bedroom, Jordan turned on the TV and is watching the news.

"Here's your drink"

"Thanks Per-Per"

"Don't mention it"

We sit there for a while, just enjoying each others company, I have my arm wrapped around her shoulder and my other hand is in hers.

"Did you check on Jack?"

"Yeah"

"How is he?"

"Still sleeping"

"Good"

He must have sensed we were happy because he started crying.

"I'll get him" Jordan got up, handed me her martini and went to go check on Jack.

_Time to start the day_ I downed the rest of my scotch and her martini and went to the kitchen to start breakfast.


	6. My Day Back

**Disclamer: Don't own Scrubs... Wish I did. **

**Info: Hey guys sorry I havent updated in well forever, but I do have an excuse ( blabs random excuse ) anyway so now that you guys know what's been going on I promise I'll try to update more often. Please enjoy the chapter.**

**- JustAGirl019**

**P.S okay italics = thoughts.**

**(Dream)**

Pan downwards from the world to find a rough neighborhood, pan more until you see an apartment complex made out of bricks and a beat up fence to keep people out. Walk along the path that is swain with cigarettes and broken glass bottles along with the occasional junkie hunched over. Go in though the wooden door half off it's hinges, clime up the stars that are Covered in a mold green carpet, the carpet has piss stains and basically any other human liquid available. Go up to a few flights until you get to 5b.

Open the door but be careful the knob falls out . Go in and see a man beating a little boy around the age of 10 getting kicked in the stomach, the kid has cruly red brown hair and gray blue eyes. His face is covers with tears. A women is sitting by a make shift table drinking out of a bottle of gin, she's just shaking her head at the scene before her but never making a move to stop it.

" You good for nothing sonofvabitch, I told you to never look at me like that"

Young Perry could never understand why his father liked to hurt him, he did nothing wrong. His father walked into the door and Perry just looked to see who it was. His father looked at him with an evil glair, walked up to him and slapped him right across the face' then his father grabbed him by the hair and forced a yelp out of the boy. He picked him up by the hair and gave him a quick jab to the ribs causing the boy to fall to his knees. Perry is still gasping at the blow he took; trying to find his breath when he looks back at his father. His father says " you little shit" and Finlay goes for the final punch.

**( Dream ends)**

...Beep...Beep...Beep..Beep

A startled Perry jumps up out of his nightmare in a cold sweat, he twists towards the end table and shuts off the alarm. His knees go to his stomach and he runs his figures though his hair trying to calm himself down from the memories of his horrible past.

_ugh, what time is it?_

I stare at the clock blindly until the red color started to actually from numbers. 4:05.

_God what I'd give to stay here and not have to go to work. _

I wish I could just say that that nightmare was just well a nightmare, but it was something that actually happened.

_Fucking Bastard I hope he dies._

I glance back as Jordan who woke up and is staring at me intentivley.

Are you okay? she askes with a worried look on her face.

I lay-ed my head against the head bored, closed my eyes and sighed.

" Yeah"

" you sure?"

" Yeah, Jordan I'm fine, really"

" Okay" She grabbed my hand in hers and lay ed her head on my shoulder.

We sat there for a long time, I honestly would of stayed there all day if I could but I glanced at the clock and it was 5:24, my shift at the hospital started at 6:30 and I wouldn't get off until 6 at night.

I pulled Jordan closer to me and lifted up her chin and kissed her, she was started at first but then she kissed back harder. After a small make out seccion I reluctantly got out of bed and turned on the shower. The hot water felt good as it splashed all over my body, I could feel it relaxing my musicles and taking out the knots in my back and neck. I rolled my head in a circular motion while the water hit my face, It felt like all my problems were washing away. Sadly I knew that was not the case.

After my shower I was ready to go, the shower put me in a sort of good mood so I wasint to unhappy about going to work today.

I went in the bedroom and gave Jordan another kiss before leaving, she was still sleeping so she didn't hear me whisper " I Love you, Mrs Cox" before I left. I have no Idea why I said that, I just felt like it. I took the stairs down to the garage, found my porsh and got in. On the way over there I stopped at McDonald's and picked up a large mocha frappe and a Mcmuffin. I would never admit this to Jordan but I was a sucker for the mocha's.

After I fiinshed my breakfest I raced over to Sacred Heart with minuets to spare, As I walked in everyone looked at me funny and started to back away.

_What the fucks wrong with them? Do they think I"m going to kill someone, or at least try to kill someone again?_

At last newbie stuck his head out from the crowd and came over to me, he was waring navy blue scrubs and his hair was gelled back in that gay sort of way that he likes so much.

" Hi Dr. Cox, how you doing today?"

I ignored him and walked away towards the locker room to get my lab coat and put my jacket away. On my way over there I ran into Barbie who was rounding a corner and hadn't seen me.

" Ooh hey, sorry Dr. Cox"

I gave her a growl and she scurried away like the mouse she was. After putting my stuff away I went over to the nurses station to get my charts.

" Hey there Perry", I turned around to see Carla smirking at me, she had on her patentent pink scrubs and scrunched up hair.

"Hi Carla"

" How's it going?"

I raised my eyebrows and answered with a " All good"

" Good" she said as she smiled.

Can I ask you a quick question? I said, I made a motion with my hand to make her come closer so I could whisper in her ear.

Do you have any idea as to why everyone acting like their walking on shards of glass around me? Don't get me wrong I love it but honestly I feel like im some sort of criminal.

" ooh dont't worry allot of them are still shocked becuase of what happend it'll pass"

sure, sure I said as I grabbed my charts from her and headed over to my first patient.

_I really hope I don't run into him today._


	7. They think I'm a criminal

**Disclaimer : Don't own Scrubs .. Wish I did. **

**Info: I am so so so so so sorry that I haven't updated in forever, I've been really busy with school and my parents are being weird and they won't really let me use the computer ggeerrr. **

**Any way I realized how short the last chapter was and I felt bad so I made a longer one for you guys. Again I just want to say sorry, I got school plus three other stories I am currently working on so bear with me I promise I WIILL NOT abandon this fanfic or any of my other ones. I will try my hardest to update more often I swear.**

**P.S thoughts in Italics**

The day went by pretty fast in the hospital - which was a first for me- before I new it I looked up from my mountain of paperwork and saw it was time for lunch.

_Oh dear God the day is almost over, if only I can get out of here without having to deal with that man this would be one of thee best day of my life._

As I got out of the chair I had been occupying for what seemed like a few days, I stretched out my back and headed over to the cafe, all the while in a trance like state.

Newbie and everybody else at Sacred Heart left me alone today, and for that I was thankful. I finally got the solitude I've been wishing for since I first arrived in this hell whole. Funny how when I got what I wanted all I wanted was for someone to ask if I was okay about this whole crap, I mean HE is here in this very hospital and everyone seems to think I'm the bad guy? _What the fuck is that shit?  
_I guess I was really out of it because the next thing I know I'm sitting by my table with some sort of sandwich and vitamin water. I sit there doing nothing in particular and I feel all eyes on me in the Cafe.  
_They probably think I'll go crazy again._

All of a sudden I got really hot, I felt the heat go up into my brain then finally settle into my chest, It was a weird feeling, I felt like I needed to lash out. I saw Carla along with her boy toy and his boyfriend and Barbie all staring at me like I was crazy. So I got up fast which caused the chair to slam onto the floor I then growled and stalked out of the room.  
Not sure of were to go I decided to do something I hadn't done in a long time, I went out to the front of the hospital and asked for a cigg, then I went to the locker room and opened McHeads locker taking out his Zippo, I finally went out over to the roof and lit myself a cig.  
As soon as I took the first drag I felt myself instantly relax, I new that it was bad for me but right now I couldn't care less, this was the only thing stooping me from doing some really stupid things, and one of them involved this roof.

\*(!*#*-0$80-012909#)*)*_)()_(_(_((_(

(JD's POV)  
Today was going to be a good day. I practically jumped out of bed and headed over to make some waffles.  
" It's waffle time it's waffle time wo-"  
YOU HAVE SOME WAFFLE'S OF MINE! Truck screamed as he joined me.  
" what's up buddy?"  
"just woke up, making waffles, you?"  
Same, Turk said as he went into the freezer and pulled out a pair of boxer shorts.  
Can you please stop doing that me and Carla both said at the same time, I gave a little chuckle and continued with my waffle making.  
seriously Turk, I'm sick of all the food in the freezer tasting like your boxers, you better stop if you want to ever get it again she said with some Latin attitude.  
Turk hung his head and Replied ok.  
After we each got dressed we all headed over to the car and got in, the ride was sort of silent but I had my Ipod in so it didn't matter.  
I will do anything for love,  
Yes I will do anything for love,  
Oh I will do anything for love,  
But I won't do that, no no that.  
By the time the song was over we were pretty much there, I hoped I didn't sing out loud but when I looked at Carla she buckled over and started laughing. Shut up I told her, which only made her start laughing more.  
When we got to the hospital I gave Turk a hug then went over to rounds, I saw Dr. Cox, it seemed like everyone was staring at him so I told him hi, which he ignored and walked away from.  
I kept on wanting to ask Dr. Cox if he was okay but for some reason I was scared he would hit me or something. I shook off that thought and went over to see Jerry.  
Hey Jerry I said while grabbing his chart, your heart is still giving me worry I'm gona set you up for a chest scan so I can get a good look, okay?  
"Sure, sure, is Perry back yet?"  
" Yep, I saw him earlier"  
" Can you get him for me, I would really like to talk to him"  
" I'll try"  
_WOW maybe I can help Perry and Jerry (ha-ha) mend there broken relationship, then he'll have to love me!_  
Since I already thought as Perry as a father figure so I could help but picture Jerry as the grandpa I never had.

**(DAY DREAM)**

**JD is a little boy warring a baseball hat, Perry's pitching the ball to him, he its it and runs into grandpa's jerry's arm wile Perry came and hug's them both...  
**

**(DAY DREAM ENDS)**

A single tear slips my eye  
If only I say with pure sadness in my voice.  
I must help them fix there relationship!  
*U()*$)(#*#*&%R()&#%\  
I looked for Perry all day but couldn't find him, I looked up at the clock and saw it was time to lunch, on my way over there I saw Perry walking down the hall going to the cafe. I was about to go and talk to him but as I looked at him his eyes were all glossy and when a few interns tried to ask him a question he didn't even respond, he just kept on walking over to the cafe.  
Is he okay?  
While I was in the lunch line I stared at Dr. Cox who was a few people down from me, he didn't even look like he knew what was going on he just grabbed random things and went over to the register, then he paid and went to sit down without even touching his food.  
He looks like a zombie!  
I went over to sit by Elliott who was eating like she never ate before.  
" Hungry much"  
"Shut up, I haven't eaten for a week now"  
" Okay?"

I pull out the chair and put my try with what looks to be soup and a sandwich down on the table.

Hey Cbear what's up? I asked Turk as I stole his French fry

Hey now get your own fry man, he said as he smacked my hand

Just one I asked as I gave him a puppy dog face

Okay man he said and handed me a fry

Carla decided she wanted a fry to so she tried to take one

Hey back away from my fry's women Turk scream.

"But Turk Carla said making a puppy dog face of her own

Nope sorry Turk said while eating a fry

Carla started muttering in Spanish but I ignored her

I was about to ask Elliott something when I realized that Dr. Cox was still sitting there not touching his food, he just sat there staring into space, I guess everyone else seemed to sensed this to because when I looked around all I saw was all eyes on Dr. Cox. He must have sensed this as well because he kept glancing around the room, then all of a sudden after a few haggard breaths he rose up quickly causing his chair to slam to the floor with a loud smack. He then let out a growl and walked out.

"Oh my God did you guys see that?"

I wonder what wrong with him Carla asked with nothing but worry on her face.

"I'll go talk to him"

I left my food and went out to follow Dr. Cox, I looked up and down the entire hospital and couldn't find him, and then I had an idea._ Maybe he's on the roof_

I walked over to the stair case and went up stairs to the roof, before I got up there I took a few breaths, as I walked out I looked around to see Perry smoking a cigarette and standing on the ledge, his foot hanging in the air.

" NO Dr. COX! DON'T DO IT"

**Hehehe Cliff hanger, don't get mad I'll try to have the next chapter up soon **


	8. The Roof and I

**Hey s**orry Guys**I know I promised I would update soon and I didn't, I'm so sorry about that so I made a sort of long chapter ( Or at least I think so?) Anyway I Will update sooner I promise I'll update soon probably tomorrow so yay :) **

**Disclaimer: Don't own Scrubs. Own my thoughts hehe**

**P. S : Thoughts in Italics.**

**Dr. Cox POV**

I was in a haze. Completely lost in another world. I couldn't even remember where i was or what I was doing. all I saw was my past, all the memorizes I locked away were poring out and I had no way of making them stop.

I saw a house, I think it was the only house we ever owned. It had white siding and gray cement steps with a black railing. There was a gray screen door and the door was painted red but its was half off because of the chipping. I saw myself sitting on the steps smoking a cigarette, I looked to be about 15 or 16. I heard someone scream and snapped my head up at the same time my younger half did. He jumped up and was about to go into the house when someone came out. It took me a while to realize that it was the devil, he didn't look as big as I always thought he was, out of habit I started cracking my knuckles waiting the fight i knew was coming. I glanced at the younger me to see he was doing the same.

I was right behind him, a good foot or two taller than him, and I knew I was way more stronger. He looked like a little kid and I wanted nothing more than to strangle him. He was only a step away, I looked over to my younger self, back then I liked to be called P or Pc haha I thought I was so cool. As I was looking at P he turned his gaze on me, at fist he was startled but he quickly composed himself as he realized he was me. I gave him a genuine smile, we both knew why I was here, to slay the devil. He hadn't noticed me yet so I decided to just strangle him to death so that I can feel the life leaving his body, I was taking the first step so that I could wrap my hands around him when I heard another scream.

" NO Dr. Cox! DON'T DO IT"

Huh what is that?

I shook my head and tried to go at him again but he was only half there, the top part of his body was there but the bottom half was replaced by a city I could see the buildings and the cars zooming below. I tried to not pay attention to that part and just contiune with trying to kill him, I went to take another step forward.

" Dr. Cox Please, Please don't do it"

This time I recognised the voice, newbie. What was he doing here?

I turned around to see newbie standing there with tears streaming down his face. Whats he crying about?

I turned around back towards my memorize but realized they were gone. I looked down to see that I was on the roof of the hospitals building, standing on the edge.

Ooh was the only thing I managed to say

" Can you please come down?"

" Yeah.. yeah I can"

I stepped down and newbie ran over to me, he pulled me into a hug and I was in to much in a daze to really care.

Dr. Cox Oh my God I thought you were dead, I thought I would never see you again. He was practically crying on my shoulder drenching my shirt in the process.

I put my arms around him, "its okay.. its all gonna be okay".

Even though I knew this was newbie I felt like I was speaking the words to Paige my sister.

He was shocked but soon after he started to relax and finally calmed down. When he was done crying and able to stand on his own I shrugged out of his grasp and went to the door.

Lets get back to work newbie I muttered and went downstairs.

&*(&*&()&*(&*^&)*^&*)(&*^&%^%^&89008

**JD POV**

_Wow._

I stood there completely shocked at what had just happened.

_Did Dr. Cox just hug me?_

I felt a rush of happiness consume me and I couldn't help dancing a little, after I did my happy dance I thought over what happened. When I got up to the roof it was like Dr. Cox didn't even hear me, he was totally out of it. It took me a few tryes to get his attention and when I did he looked shocked to be up here. _But what if he was just acting about that? what if he was trying to kill himself?_I shuddered at the thought and headed downstairs after him.


	9. Monster awakend

**Okay sorry I haven't updated in a while, I sort of had writers block but now its all good. **

**Disclaimer: Don't own Scrubs ****JD POV**

I Tried to talk to Dr. Cox all day but whenever I brought up what happened with the roof he either walked away, told me to shut up, or just ranted and ranted about how I'm a girl.

I saw Dr. Cox walking out of a paintients room. Hey Dr. Cox I yelled. Go away newbie he yelled back.

_I wonder what he's gonna tell Jordan?_

Me being the idiot that I am decided to ask him that question. " Hey Dr. Cox, what should we tell Jordan?"

He stooped mid walk and turned his attention to me, he was a few feet away from me but was quickly gaining. I suddenly had the feeling I should run away and I was about to before he grabbed me by my scrubs Collier and yanked me into a closet.

" Now you listen to me, no one is going to say a word of this to Jordan do you hear me If you mention any of this to her I will kill you and I won't even think twice about it."

" oh.. okay I mumbled"

He realeased his hold on me and I fell to the floor as he turned and walked away. I sat on the floor for a long time before Carla came looking for me.

" What's wrong Bambi?"

" Dr. Cox"

" Did he do this to you?"

" Carla just leave it alone, I'm okay I swear"

" No, I'm going to go talk to him, I have to tell him about Jerry anyway"

She gave me a kiss on the cheek and walked away while I sat on the floor.

$^*&(*&^%%%%%%%$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

**Dr. Cox POV:**

_God I cant believe Newbie is such an idiot, what should I tell Jordan, what does he mean what should we tell Jordan? Why would I tell her what happen? I'm not even sure what happened myself and he wanted to tell Jordan! Ugh I need a drink._

I was standing by the nurses station doing out paper work when I felt a weird chill go down my back, after shaking it off I went back to work. That's when it happened, The evil beast that is Carla came strutting down the hall casting an evil glair at me.

"WHATDIDYOUDOTOJD!"

" Um, what?"

" What. Did. You. Do. To. JD?"

"Nothing, why?"

" He is laying on the floor staring into space because you hurt him"

_What a little girl_

"Look I didn't do anything to him, clearly the girl can't take a little roughing up, I didn't even hit him so I don't know why he's running off to his mommy"

_Oh shit, I sware sometimes I really need to keep my mouth shut_

" Okay I'm going to pretend you didn't just say that and make you go apologize to JD right now"

" No, I'm not going anywhere Carla, I'm going to finish my shift, get my things and go home"

" Oh no you are not your going to apologize to JD then your going to go talk to your father"

I froze, my muscles flexed automatically as if waiting for an attack . I felt bile starting to spew into my mouth and it took all I had not to hit something.

" Don't you ever call that.. thing, my father" My words were hard and cold, distant. An old part of me began rising to the surface, the part of me i tried to hide away from everyone. The murder inside me, it thirsted for his blood, to finally end this raging battle and claim victory.

Carla must have sensed something was wrong because she took a few steps back then asked if I was okay. I stared at her with distant eyes, not really seeing or paying attention to what she was saying. I was fighting internally with the monster I've hid for years, and it was winning.

After a few more minuets of me being frozen in a battle like state, i finally was able to regain myself and unflex my muscles, a minuet or two after I was my old self again. I blinked a few times then put on a fake smile on and said "why sure Carla, just don't say that ever again."

" you sure?"

" Yeah Carla, I'm sorry but what were you saying?"

She gave me a dumbfounded expression and said " We were talking about JD and how you should apologise to him... then I said you should go talk to... someone else"

_Shes acting very cautious, I like it._

" Oh yeah right, well I'm not apologising to anybody so your just going to have to deal with it. and As for that other person, he can go die for all I care"

Then I turned and walked away.

I avoided Carla and the whole scooby doo gang for the rest of my shift, it wasn't easy but I made it happen. As I was going home I heard Jerry calling for me.

"Pery, Perry is that you?, please come here I really want to talk to you"

I closed my eyes took three deep breaths and walked out of the building.

When I got home Jordan was waiting on the couch, I gave a short smile at her and ran towards the Scotch cabinet.

" rough day?"

" haha more like rough life"

I came to sit next to her, drink and bottle in hand.

" Carla called"

I raised my eyebrows but said nothing as I swollowed the amazing liquid.

" She said she thought you were going to kill her earlier"

" Really?"

" Yea, are you okay?"

I sighed and drank another glass full, then I set the glass and bottle on the Coffee table leaned back into the couch and rubbed my head in my hands.

"I feel like I'm losing it"

" How so?"

" That... feeling I used to get after the... incident. It came back to day, when Carla mentioned him, but she said he was my... my" I brought my hands down on the table causing the glass to shake. Jordan took my hands in hers.

" Shhh, babe it's okay"

" Jordan what am I going to do, I already killed someone because of him, what if I do it again, I mean I almost Killed Carla, I was thinking of a million different ways to slit her throat or brake her neck"

" You're going to get throught this, your stronger then you were before, we both are. I'm going to help you through this even more now, baby I love you"

I kissed her deep and passionate.

_I wish I new she was right._

**Okay I know this is sort of short but I'll have a new chap out soon so just deal for now lol. These past few chaps have been fillers to get to the better stuff and since I don't plan anything my outline is all in my head. So in my head this story will really start to kick off in the chapter after the next one. But keep in mind that my head changes things allot haha. **


	10. Just Pressing though

**Info: Sorry I haven't updated anything in well a year lol but I didn't have a computer to work on. Unfourtenlty I still don't have one at the moment all though I am hoping to get one for my bday next Wednesday and if and when I do I promise I will update more and finish this story already! **

**Disclaimer: Scrubs is not mine although I do have all the series!**

(Jordan pov)

Jordan couldn't sleep, as she much as she tried she could not for the life of her close her eyes and fall asleep. She couldn't help but think of the early years of her and Perry relationship, the countless bruises on his face and body, the many trips to the hospital. She shuddered at the memory and turned to face him, he was sound asleep which amazed her considering what he went though last night. He looked so beautiful while asleep, so relaxed it was like she was looking at an entirely different person. She knew that relaxed person because it was who he had been all thoughts years ago in high school and collage, it was the guy she fell in love with and she was glad that even though they had both changed dramatically since then but it was still nice to see that part of him never completely died.

"No… no Tom, I'm... I'm sorry"

She froze. _ Tom? No he couldn't be dreaming about that night can he?_

"No… Tom… he's not breathing, oh god he's not breathing"

She looked at him again, he started tossing and turning, sweat had formed on his face and he was going rigid. Quickly she shook him awake.

"Perry… Perry wake up its all right I'm here"

He stirred awake and for a second looked very much like the scared young man she once knew. Quickly his face hardened into the face of a survivor as she liked to think of it. "Jordan what happened?" he asked. "You had a bad dream, are you okay?" He snorted, "We both know it wasn't just a dream" he said as she pulled him close to her. "That's it, I'm going to make sure Jerry's transferred out there as soon as possible" she said. He looked at her, "really?" "Yeah" she smiled.

( Dr. Cox POV)

The next day at work was just as hectic as the next, Carla was refusing to talk to him because of what he did to her precious bambi and of course if she was mad so were all the other nurses which made it hard for him to get charts and labs on time. On top of that Newbie decided that since he is a little girl he was going to switch his shift with nervous guy again so that he could take a brake from Dr. Cox. _ Ohh boo-hoo what a little girl_ what bothered him even more is that Jordan said Jerry wouldn't be able to be shipped out of here for about another week.

All in all it was a very crappy day for the older doctor and all he wanted to do was just have a nice bottle of scotch. _ Ooh what I'd do to be at home right now but no I got stuck with a 12 hour shift! Dam kelso and everyone here to hell! _ Just as he was rounding the corner Perry felt something bump into him, he automatically went stiff and stared down the young doctor who was sprawled out on the floor. " Oh well if it isn't Gloria" he sneered and then without another word he walked over his old protogue and continued down the hall with a growl.

( J.D POV)

_I felt bad about Dr. Cox, he was obviously going though allot of emotional term oil but I just couldn't deal with him treating me that way anymore, I know it was a bad move but I just had to switch my shift. I need at least a day away from that drama. _ As he was walking down the hall he ran into Carla who was rounding the corner, "Oh sorry bambi, didn't see you there, hey did you see Dr. Cox anywhere?" she asked.

"Nope sorry Carla" I replied. "Oh okay see you later then" she said as she turned and left.

_I wonder if I should tell Jordan about what happened with Dr. Cox, I mean he tried to kill himself, what was he thinking standing on the ledge of the roof? Then he gets all weird and hugs me, comforts me for crying. Shouldn't I have comforted him for almost jumping off the roof? It was all confusing. Then I was just trying to help when he got mad and grabbed me I didn't know what to do, what was I suppost to do?_ Just as I was rounding yet another corner I collided with something hard which caused me to sink to the ground becoming a little dizzy. I looked up to see Dr. Cox staring at me with a sneer on his face "Well if it isn't Gloria" he said then walked over me and continued down the hall. With some dignity intact I got up off the floor and went to check on Jerry.

( Carla Pov)

After I ran into JD I went over to the nurse's station to see if Perry might have been there. I felt really bad about how I've been treating him today especially after I talked to Jordan.

**Earlier that day:**

"Hey Jordan" I smiled; She smiled back and walked over to me.

"Oh so you're the reason Perry is stressed out" she smirked.

"Excuse me?" I replied _what is she talking about?_

"Oh nothing Per-Per was just complaining how everyone here thinks he's the bad guy when that monster gets treated like a saint. Honestly you people know nothing about Jerry yet you know Perry for many years. Why betray his trust? Why not believe him when he says he Jerry's a bad guy?"

With another smile Jordan walked off.

**Present time:**

_I wonder where he is. Didn't J.D find him on the roof last time?_ I headed over to the roof to see if my suspicion my correct in Perry's whereabouts. As soon as the door opened I saw him sitting on the ledge his legs dangling off the edge, his heads in his hands. He didn't look like he saw or heard me so I decided to sneak up on him. I got half way towards him when he lifted his head up and sighed. "What do you want Carla?" he asked as he took a hit from a cigarette I hadn't seen before. "How did you know?" I asked curious to his ways. He Shrugged and turned his attention back to the ground below.

I took this as an invitation and settled myself down next to him. "I haven't been a very good friend" I finally announced after a few minuets of silence. "How so?" he asked as he inhaled on his cigarette. "Well for starters I've been treating you pretty badly today, not to mention I've been taking Jerry's side though all of this, when did you start smoking?"

He exhaled and replied "Since yesterday, Look Carla don't beat yourself up about all of this, He can win people over and I don't blame you for getting mad for what I did to J.D, you're his friend to; you have every right to be angry at me for what I did" _ It's funny how he only calls him bambi J.D when it's only me and him around._ "So how do you feel, about this whole Jerry thing?" I asked as I laid a hand on his. He turned his hand palm up and grabbed my hand tightly in his. "Honestly Carla I don't know what to think, I mean I haven't seen him since.. Well since an incident happened which was well before I entered med school and now all of a sudden he just shows up out of the blue and he wants to talk to me, I mean what is that?"

I gave his hand a reassuring squeeze, "want some advice?" I asked timidly.

"Sure" he replied. "Go talk to him, see what he wants" I replied.

"I'll think about it" he answered.

TBC

**Thought I'd give you guys a long chapter to make up for me not updating in a while. Hope you enjoyed it. **


	11. The loss of a brother

**Wow I feel like an idiot… word of advice don't ****try to update two stories at once at 6 in the morning. Anyway here is another chapter the real chapter for this chapter lol**

**Disclaimer : Scrubs is not mine. **

_This is it. _Thought Dr. Cox as he walked down the hallway. _You can do this Perry, you can DO this._ He chanted in his head as he made his way to room number 312.

Everyone on the floor stopped and watched him; Laverne was taking animatedly on the phone while she watched him make his way to the room. No doubt filling someone in on all the gossip, Newbie and her girlfriend Ghandie were staring at him with shocked looks on their faces. Ghandie even had half a doughnut in his mouth while the other half lay on the floor.

Jordan was there as well watching him as he made his way to the door, he almost smirked at how hard if was for her to hide her concern but quickly discarded the thought to not cause anymore problems.

As his hands grasped the door knob he closed his eyes and let out a long sigh _this is it Per no turning back now._ In an attempt to look more intimidating he puffed his chest out and opened the door into the devils lair.

As he walked in the room Jerry put down the book he was reading and set his glasses aside on the desk. "Oh so I see you finally decided to let me talk to you" he said slowly.

Perry sighed, "I only did it because everyone in this dammed hell won't shut up about you, so please say what you need so I can leave" Perry huffed out.

"Don't you dare talk to me that way!" Jerry said in a menacing voice taking Perry back to his childhood.

"I can speak to you how ever dam way I like" Perry said with as much venom he could muster into his voice.

Jerry sighed "I didn't come here to fight with you, Perry I came to talk to you about your brother-""I don't have a brother Perry Yelled, You killed him" he said pointing a figure.

Jerry sighed once again " You were the one with the gun"

Perry gave him a hard glare " I'm not talking about him, I'm talking about my first brother; you know the only other boy besides me that you had with MY MOM, not that skank you left us for"

" Don't you dare speak about Vanessa" Jerry roared.

" You know what …FUCK YOU, you come here to try to talk to me about the Half brother I never knew nor want to know, then you pretend like Charlie never existed when you KILLED HIM!. I was there… I was fucking there when it happened."

Perry felt as if he wasn't in the room with Jerry anymore but instead in his old home when he was 14 years old and his younger brother who was 10 at the time. Page was only 3 or 4 at the time so she had no recollection of the event.

"You…you were drunk, another binge drinking session I guess; I was out with some friends at the time. I guess Charlie he….he drew a picture for you…of our family" Perry felt hot tears go down his cheek but for once in his life didn't care about showing emotions.

" He went to show you and you…you kicked him, square in the head. Mom told me what happened. She said you kicked him again then grabbed your coat and said you had someone else and we should all go die.

I…I came home later on… I was so happy, Jordan finally agreed to go out with me, I got home and mom she … she lost it she kept on cleaning the house. So I went over to the front room to sit on the couch and I stepped on this sticky stuff.

I looked over and Charlie he….he was crying, blood was pouring out of his head. I swept him into my arms and he looked at me and said I made this for you I held him close and cried, the blood was to much there was no way to stop the bleeding.

I told him he was going to be all right, I told him I loved him, He smiled at me and said he would always love his big brother… then he was dead his eyes were all glazed over and he…" Perry fell to his knees and quickly he was so cold."

"You're a sick bastard, did you kick your other sons in the head while they tried to show you a picture they drew, DID YOU! You filthy son of a bitch you fucking bastard! Perry realized only just now that the door was still opened and everyone heard his story.

Jerry just stared at him his face ghostly pale his mouth agape as if he was trying to say something. "Your lucky mom didn't testify agenst you, I was still to young I couldn't do it without parent consent, She protected you until she died, again a death caused by you" Perry quickly composed himself

"You know what Fuck you… I hope you die" Perry said softly and walked out of the room.

**Wow this is way more depressing then I originally thought. Sorry If this made you sad and sorry I took so long to update but I had a bad case of writers block, but I'm back now so don't worry. **


	12. Stay with me

**Hey everyone! I'm ****back; summer break is here so yay! Anyway I just wanted to apologize for the Harry Potter chapter mix-up. I guess I learned my lesion to not try and update two stories at the same time. **

**So anyway If you haven't already read the other chapter please go back and read it. I fixed the problem ****earlier but I'm not sure if anyone read it because there have been no recent reviews. **

**Also I just wanted to say that I'm sorry if you're confused with all of Dr. Cox siblings, I promise it will make sense soon and if you guys are still having trouble with it I will try and explain it better. **

**So anyway I hope you guys and gals enjoy this chapter and reviews are highly appreciated. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Scrubs, But I do own this story. Just not the characters. **

**P.S Thoughts are in Italics. **

**( J.D**** P.O.V)**

Everyone was shocked as stalked out of Jerry's room huffing and puffing. Looking more like a monster than man. It all started when Dr. Cox's dad was admitted to Sacred Heart. Since then Dr. Cox has taken to destroying the hospital and being an emotional wreck.

No one really understood why he was being so angry towards his dad, we all knew his father was abusive and a drunk but we never exactly knew exactly what 's upbringing was like.

Of course until now... a few minuets ago Dr. Cox went to go confront his father and ended up admitting that his father killed his younger brother. After yelling at his father he left followed by Jordan shortly after.

"Wow" I heard myself say into the silence that followed after 's exit. No one moved I guess we were all shocked. _ Poor _. "Well that was interesting" I heard Lavern say as we all started to come out from the shock.

Just then we heard the sound of a penitent crashing, and it was coming from Jerry's Room.

_Oh crap. _

**(Dr****. Cox P.O.V)**

As I stalked though the halls of the hospital I heard soft footsteps echo behind me. "Go away Jordan" I say over my shoulder as I walk over to the stairs. "No, I'm not leaving" I hear her reply. Just as I'm about to open the door to the stairs she pushes me into the elevator which just opened.

"What are you doing Jordan?" I ask angrily. "We need to talk" She says as she presses the stop button on the elevator. Then she walks back over to me and pulls me into a hug. "Are you okay?"

"What do you think?" I huff out as she kisses my neck.

"I think you need a break from everything, I can drop Jack over at my moms for a few days" She purred seductively. "Maybe "I say. Not really knowing what I'm saying. My thoughts keep going back to the devil a few floors away. _I hope he dies soon. _I find myself thinking, I grind my teeth together and clench my jaw at the thought of him.

Jordan sighs and puts her hand on my cheek forcing me to actually look at her. "No, you need a break. Come on, we can go out. Maybe see a movie or something, and then we can relax at the house without a baby to worry about." She moved closer to me and whispered in my ear "And If your up or it, we can have allot of fun on our bed".

She brings her lips to mine and everything is gone, all my problems, everything. I kiss her back fiercely and push her agents the wall. We continue to kiss a little more before I reluctantly let her go and press the button for the elevator to move.

_I guess I do deserve a day to relax. _

**( P.O.V)**

The sun in my eyes let me know it was time to get up; With a grunt and a few blinks of my eyes I'm ready to face the day.

_Gosh what a night with Jordan, It was nice to get my mind off things. Of course now I have to pull a 14 hour shift according to Kelso since I walked out. _

I look at Jordan who's still sleeping on my chest. _Gosh what a women, I can't believe she's actually there for me. I Know I would be more of a wreck if not for her. _

As I stare down at her face I think of all we've been though; we both grew up in the same area, went to the same school and eventually High school. We never liked each other much in grade school but when high school came around I couldn't keep my eyes off her.

Of course I was lucky to be best buds with her brother Ben, so I got to see her all the time. Eventually I got up the courage to ask her out and when she finally said yes I was ecstatic. But of course that all changed when my brother died; Still she stuck with me threw the hard times; she was the only one aside from her brother who knew how my father treated me and my siblings.

Then we both went to different colleges, our lives each going off in different directions, I wanted to be a doctor. She, she just wanted to party. She never really told me what she wanted to do with her life. I never knew if she dreamed of something big.

Then fresh into med school, one night I'm out at a bar and who do I bump into? Her of course, It was always her. We started dating again and I decided in a fit of young passion that I would never lose her again. That she would be mine.

The propose went really well I took her downtown where we ate at a fancy restaurant then we walked down to the pier. I remember once she told me she loved the ocean so that's where I proposed to her. I guess I was a little more in tune with my emotions then, I figured I'd make it all romantic. Give her another reason to love the ocean.

Soon we were married, Happily Married. Then it all changed, I found out my father had another family and I went to confront him. I'll never forgive myself for that night. After that night something snapped, something changed; I wasn't the same person anymore. I had and still don't have any hope. My emotions went out the window forever gone to me. I became a rock, an island so nothing could ever hurt me again.

With the new change brought new problems. Jordan complained we weren't communicating anymore - not that I cared at the time - I found being an intern was hard work and with the stress building with each new patient that was thrusted into my hands the more Jordan suffered.

I'd never hit a women, no. But what I did was worse. Any trust or communication we had in the relationship or with each other I destroyed. It's really no wonder why she cheated in the first place. What did I expect? I treated her like shit anyway.

When she cheated, god that still hurts; not like I'd tell her that though. I found I couldn't actually blame her anymore than I could blame myself. Those years without her were the hardest years I've ever been though. But just like that she came back, for sex she claimed. She said she owned me now as part of our divorce agreement. I fained annoyance but actually I was happy to have her back in my life again.

We played that sick little game for a while, both claming it was just for the sex, but we couldn't help ourselves. I'd put to much passion into the kiss or she'd "accidentally" snuggle into me during the night. We both knew we wanted each other, but were both to proud to admit it.

We tried dating again, but I messed up. I always mess up.

I thought I lost her forever then; no more booty calls no more drunken phone sex. Nothing. She was gone and I was alone again.

I tried finding someone else but it didn't work out, but I forced myself to believe it did. When she came back, pregnant I promised myself I would never let her leave again. I'd be there for her even her son.

I was happy again, we were happy again. When I found out Jack was my son, I don't think I could ever explain the feeling. Maybe because I stopped feeling long ago.

And now here we are, a few months later and now it's my turn to suffer again. I thought she would leave, maybe she'd think it would be like when I was an intern all over again. But so far she's staid and it's shocked me completely.

"Per-per, you okay?" She asks shaking me out of my musings. "Yeah, I was just thinking" I reply.

"About what?"

"About us, about what we've been though"

"Oh"

Suddenly she pulls my head down and captures my lips. "I don't know exactly what you were thinking but know that I won't leave. Not this time" She says after we end the kiss.

I nod at a loss of what to say. _ Grow a pair man! Get it together. _

After a make out session with Jordan I leave to go to work.

_Okay Perry YOU CAN DO THIS! Just go in there take care of your penitents and get out. Don't talk to anyone, don't look at anyone and don't care about anyone. _

After my little pep talk I walk into the doors of Sacred Heart. After getting my lab coat and putting my jacket away I walk over to my floor and immediately spot Newbie who's walking towards me with a sad expression.

_Gosh can I get one day without something dramatic happening! Maybe it's nothing though the kid does have a knack to overreact. _

"What is it Newbie?" I ask while closing my eyes. _I just got here and I already have a headache. Great. _

"Um… it's about Jerry" he stammers out while taking a step back our of harms way. _Stupid kid I can still hit you!_

"What about him?" I ask though gritted teeth.

"He's…He's dead" He says after a moment looking at me with scared eyes.

"Oh"

**Hehe sort of ciffy. So I made this chapter a bit long because I really wanted to explain Jordan and Perry's relationship. By the By I know Dr. Cox may seem out of character but I want him to be like this because, well he's going though allot of crap right now. You can't expect him to be all there after what's going on. **

**I promise he'll be back to his usual sarcastic self soon enough. Maybe. **

**Anyway enjoy and please please please please review. **

**Thanks, **

**Justagirl019**


	13. A good day turned Bang!

**_Hey all Sorry I havent updated but my computer is now completly broken :( Sad I know. Anyway I just wanted to give you guys the heads up because I will try to update when I can which is really when ever I get my hands on a computer. _**

**_Disclamer: I do not own Scrubs. _**

**_( Dr. Cox P.O.V)_**

_Did I hear him right? Maybe I'm dreaming._

I pinch the bridge of my nose and cross my arms against my chest.

"He's dead" I ask eyes still closed.

"Yeah" I hear Newbie reply sadly.

"Are you sure" I ask again.

"Yeah. After you guys argued he um went into cardiac arrest. There was nothing I could do. I'm sorry" He hung his head in defeat.

"So he's actually dead. Gone. Forever" I said pronouncing each word slowly, as I got to the forever part I couldn't help but smile.

"Yeah" he replied giving me an odd look when I opened my eyes.

" Haha ahh what good new to hear in the morning" I said with a smile and continued walking towards the nurses station.

Newbie tapped my shoulder "excuse me what did you just say"

"Look here Newbie; the guy was a grade A prick who caused lots of pain to me and my family. In all honestly I'm glad he's gone. In fact I'm actually re-he-al-ly happy about what happened. So I would love it if you could suck up the water works for a little so I can actually enjoy my day" with that said I turned on my heal and walked towards Karla.

As I reached Karla she looked down quickly. I sighed bringing my arms to cross over my chess as I let out a huff.

"Karla is there something wrong?"

Her head snapped up as she took in my expression. "Um, I just wanted to let you know about what happened to Jerry you see-"

I raised my hand up to stop her from continuing "Sorry Karla, Newbie beat cha there to it." I said with a cheeky smile.

Karla looked at me like I was crazy "So you know he's dead?"

"Yep and I couldn't be anymore happy" I said truthfully as I grabbed my assigned charts.

"Look I'd sure love to stay and chat but I have patients to attend to." With one last smile I left leaving behind a very confused and worried Karla and Newbie.

**( J.D P.O.V)**

Dr. Cox has lost his mind! I thought that when I told him about Jerry he would be sad or out of it or…or something! Instead he smiles and says he is so happy.

Maybe he's just messing around when really he's depressed or sad. I should hug him later.

**(Karla P.O.V)**

Ring….Ring…Ring

"Hello?"

"Jordan? It's Karla"

"Can I ask why you're calling me?"

"Um it's about Perry, he's acting strange"

"Strange how?"

"Well Jerry died and he's totally happy about it"

"Yeah I know. And as for Perry well he has every right to be. Honestly I'm so sick of you guys doing this all the time. Who are you to say how people deal with death. Knowing Perry he's shocked but relived. You don't even know him like I do you really shouldn't concern yourself with this"

Click.

The line went dead.

_Well that went well._

**( ****Jordan's P.O.V)**

" Sorry about that "

" It's fine. What's going on?"

" Um I'm not sure I should be the one to tell you, maybe Perry should talk to you about it later"

"Is it about my father please tell me what's going on"

"Okay John I'll tell you, your father um. He's dead.

**(No P.O.V)**

"Hi I'm John. I'm Jerry's son."

"Oh yes of course come this way"

**( Dr. Cox P.O.V)**

Today was long but good. I can't wait to get home to Jordan and tell her about the good news.

I was standing by the nurse's station with Newbie who was talking to Karla about something but I wasn't paying attention. Just then a nurse and a young guy walked in.

He was white with blue eyes and brown hair. He was tall; at least 6'1 with a tan completion. For some reason I couldn't keep my eyes off the kid. He looked so familiar.

"And this is Dr. Dorian. He was the doctor in charge of your father's treatment"

J.D snapped his head up at the mention of his name and smiled at the kid who just gave him a blank expression. I continued to stare at the kid wondering why on earth he looked so dam familiar.

And then in a blink of an eye the kid was pulling something out of his backpack. As he dropped the backpack from his hand out came my Jericho 941 F 9mm handgun. Then he pointed my gun at J.D. My protégé.

He quickly snapped his arm up and shot a bullet in the ceiling which groaned in agony. Everyone stopped what they were doing and a few girls scream.

The kid pointed at everyone with the gun.

"You move you die" he snarled

Then he turned his attention back to J.D

"You're the reason my fathers dead. So now you will die too" He yelled

_Oh no!_

"J.D NOO!" I yelled.

**Bang!**


	14. A Time Of Death and Pain

**Hi everyone! Just want to apologize for the lack in updating. A friend of mine passed away a few weeks ago, needless to say his death has rendered me muse less. I am only finally starting to begin to write again. It's been a long and tiring process so I am very sorry. **

**But anyway I'****m getting back on my feet.**

**R.I.P Bryan A. Delia.**

**Warning this chapter is LONG! So if you need a break please do so **

**Disclaimer : I do not own Scrubs. **

I don't know what it was. Instinct? adrenalin? First I see my long lost step brother pull out a gun, then in a blink of an eye I'm in front of J.D taking the bullet. Feeling the white hot pain of the metal ripping though my flesh and muscle. I land on the floor with a thud as a dull blur takes over my senses but I'm able to realize the bullet hit my left shoulder.

J.D falls to my side helping me pull myself up against the nurses wall. John has the gun pointed at J.D again. " Holy fuck, Fuck!" I hear John yelling. He is pacing back in forth gun pointing in all directions. Suddenly John has the gun pointed at J.D again. His finger grazes the trigger as he looks around widely at the small group before him. He takes aim and I'm hit with another jolt of energy.

"NO…..no wait" I yell my other hand clutching my wound as the blood poured out. John turns his attention to me, a small smirk displayed upon his lips.

"You just don't know when to quit do you?" I close my eyes for a moment taking deep calm breaths.

"It's not J.D's fault …..It's…its mine" "What are you talking about? Dr. Dorian was my fathers doctor!" John yelled once again pointing the gun at my protégé.

"Wait!" I yelled pulling myself up one handed so that I could stand. Leaning heavily on the counter I continued. "You don't remember me do you? I came to your house one day, with that very same gun you have in your hand"

I hear the crowd gasp. I know the cops are on there way by now. All I need to do is stall John so that they can come and get him before he hurts anyone else, or more importantly J.D.

" What are you talking about?" John asks now glancing at the gun then back at me. " I showed up to your house a few years ago, you see I found out my dad, Our dad. Was cheating on my mom. He left her, she had not job and he just fucking left her."

I take a brake to catch my breath. " So I showed up with a gun, determined to make him at least help my mom pay for the house. When I walked in you were sitting on the floor watching T.V you had to be about 9 or 10 at the time. Your mother, she was on the couch. He, your, our father " I spat. " He was sitting on a chair, you know I watched you guys a few times before I showed up at your house that night. I saw the way he played with you guys, how he never hit you are your bother. I was jealous, how could he leave my family for a new one?"

I slowly stood up now standing straight, right arm still clutching my left shoulder. My hand drenched with the never ending spill of blood coming form the wound. " I pulled out the gun, the very one you got in your hand. I'd recognize it anywhere. I'm not sure if you knew this when you most likely took it from my house but did you know that is the very same gun that killed your older brother?" John gasped his hand shaking eyes scanning the gun.

_Oh God Jordan, I hope she's okay. The bastard had better not hurt her!_

"What did you do to my wife?" I ask angrily "She's fine…. I didn't do anything to her, I just punched her" John said softly still staring at the gun in his hand.

I felt a deep heat rise in my chest, it took all I had not to jump on him right then and there and beat him senseless but unfortunately the gun was still loaded and pointed at me.

"You…you killed my brother?" John asked looking at me with a new hatred in his eyes.

"Yes.. I was angry, so angry that he left my mom. I had to make him help her. I had to. Then as I had the gun pointed at him, as I was about to shoot your brother ran between us. The bullet hit him in the head. He died instantly, there's not a day that goes by where I don't regret what happened. I'm sorry"

John stayed silent. Then without warning he pointed the gun at me and shot. " NO!" I hear J.D yell, he sounds like he's been crying.

The force of the bullet made me fall back against the counter, white hot heat filled my stomach as pain raked though my body. A small yell escapes my lips as my hand goes down to put pressure on the new wound.

"And now for you!" John yells pointed the gun at J.D again.

Once again I find myself coming to J.D's aid. Even now with two bullet wounds, blood running down my left shoulder and right side. My vision is very blurry and I feel myself becoming weaker, yet. I continue fighting.

" He didn't kill your dad, I did" The guns pointed at me now. I know I'm not going to live, I know I'm going to die with these next few shots.

_I'm sorry Jack, I'm sorry Jordan._

Suddenly someone screams and runs towards the crowd pushing herself though towards the front. I realize it's Jordan her hair disheveled and hey right eye with a black and blue mark around it. She tries to run towards me but The Janitor of all people is holding her back.

John turns back over towards me "Tell me what you did" he screeched.

" Dr. Cox NO!" J.D cried I also noticed his boyfriend was holding him back, tears were running down his face as he looked at me with despair.

"Shut it newbie, it is my fault." I turned to John "I… I refused to treat him, then I scream at him, causing him stress which his heart couldn't handle because of its weak state. He had a heart attack shortly after. It was all my fault, no one else" I stated firmly. I noticed I slid down towards the floor a little more.

John said nothing for a moment " You monster, now its time for you to die!" he yelled. Then _ Bang, Bang, Bang. _ Three shots to the chest, more pain; more darkness clouding my vision. I fell to the floor, all the strength in my legs gone.

I started gasping for air as I lost more blood I also began to get cold.

_Well, this is it then. _I muse. My head leaning against the wall, my chest moving in hard irregular breaths. _ Bang Bang_. Another shot to the stomach, the other hit my thigh. More pain more darkness. I hear people screaming. _" Oh no oh God no!" _ I hear someone scream. It's Jordan I think. I'm not sure though I can't concentrate. I just want to sleep.

_No, no Perry you can't sleep. You sleep you don't wake up, you sleep you die. _

More irregular breathing. My body is wet, covered in blood.

I faintly hear a crash and another bang then Jordans at my side holding my head In her lap.

" Oh God Perry, Perry are you there? Stay with me baby Please. I need you. Please don't go. I need you, I can't live without you"

I listen to the beautiful voice of my wife telling me that she needs me, telling me how much she loves me. She sounds so scared I wish I could take her pain away. She grabs my blood soaked hand. I squeeze her hand with all my strength which admittedly isn't much.

" That's right Perry, stay with me. Don't leave. Think of Jack, think of me"

She sounds like she's crying now. I want so desperately to take her in my arms and tell her its going to be okay but the darkness is coming nearer. My bodies growing weaker and suddenly the lids of my eyes are the hardest things in the world to keep up.

_Come on! Keep it together. Keep it together for her and Jack._

More pain, more darkness….I can't do this. I'm going to die.

_Tell her, let her know you love her before you go._

Forcing my eyes to open I slowly reach my arm up and caress her face, whipping away her tears with my thumbs in the process. " I…I…I…Lov-love you" I gasp. She smiles a sad smile holding my hand closer to her face, her tears now mixing with my blood. "I know, I love you too" she adds. Glad that I made her feel a little better I smile as she gives me a soft kiss on my lips before slipping into a peaceful nothingness.

**Ooh cliffy sort of haha.**

**Wow this was very hard to write I'm not going to lie. It came out okay I suppose, there are some parts I absolutely love ( Like the ending) and parts I hate ( The whole talking instead of shooting part) but things needed to be said so that the story could truly be explained. Yes, I know it's long but honestly I just could not stop haha**

**Anyway please review and tell me what you think. This whole shooting scene is what really sparked this fanfictiocn to me so of course this chapter means allot to me ( Even if I'm not happy with the entire thing) **


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